People and their Drinks

lfcrule1972 · 29 Jun 2006, 09:01 PM

PEOPLE & THEIR DRINKS

A recent magazine survey, interviewed fifty bartenders and they were asked if they could identify a customer’s personality on what drinks they ordered?
Although interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts.
The results:

IF WOMEN DRINK ...

BEER
Personality: Casual, low maintenance; down to earth.
Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.

COCKTAILS OR BLENDER DRINKS WITH UMBRELLA
Personality: Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the ass.
Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.

MIXED DRINKS - NO UMBRELLAS E.G.; GIN AND TONIC / SCOTCH AND SODA
Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants
Approach: If she wants you, she’ll send YOU a drink.

WATER
Personality: Pretentious and is looking for a serious relationship.
Approach: Don’t.

WINE - (BOTTLED, NOT 4 LITRE CASK)
Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated.
Approach: Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation.

BACARDI BREEZER, RED SQUARE, ARCHERS COOLER, SMIRNOFF ICE, MUDSHAKE ETC.
Personality: Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has no clue.
Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is... and you’re in.

CAPE VELVET
Personality: Annoying voice, bit of a tart.
Approach: Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub.

SHOTS AND SLAMMERS (TEQUILA, VODKA, AFTERSHOCK ETC.)
Personality: Hangs around with male work pals or looking to get drunk...and naked.
Approach: Easiest hit in the pub, Nothing to do but wait.......

IF MEN DRINK... (As always, very simple and clear cut.)

CIDER
He’s probably under-aged and wants to get laid.

CHEAP DOMESTIC BEER
He’s poor / student and wants to get laid.

CASTLE LAGER BEER
He likes good beer and wants to get laid.

IMPORTED BEER
He’s old; he likes good beer and wants to get laid.

GUINNESS
The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another.

WATER
He just threw up and is trying to wash the taste out of his mouth so that he can still get laid

WINE
He’s hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid.

VODKA OR BRANDY
Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid.

PORT
Thinks he’s sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to get laid.

WHISKY
He doesn’t give two $hits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid.

JACK DANIELS
Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid.

RUM OR TEQUILA
Likes fighting almost as much as getting laid.

BACARDI BREEZER, RED SQUARE, ARCHERS COOLER, SMIRNOFF ICE, ETC
He’s gay (blatantly) - don’t turn your back or pick up any dropped change.

Kabuchan · 29 Jun 2006, 10:08 PM

That's priceless, lfcrule1972. Love it!

Wine drinker myself, but I think Paris is a bit spoiled!

AlienX69 · 29 Jun 2006, 10:40 PM

TEQUILA, Please ......

lfcrule1972 · 29 Jun 2006, 10:40 PM

I have never been to Paris, either the French Capital nor the Hotel Heiress.....

lfcrule1972 · 29 Jun 2006, 10:41 PM

Mines a whisky then

lfcrule1972 · 29 Jun 2006, 10:42 PM

Doesn't look good for Guinness drinkers tho eh ?

AlienX69 · 29 Jun 2006, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lfcrule1972

I have never been to Paris, either the French Capital nor the Hotel Heiress.....

Capitol would be good, the other ..... PASS !

AlienX69 · 29 Jun 2006, 10:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lfcrule1972

Doesn't look good for Guinness drinkers tho eh ?

Beer .... favorite ... Mich, Amber Bock

floresdave · 29 Jun 2006, 11:19 PM

Makers Mark Johnie Walker or Henry Weinhards basically all i drink(as far as alcohol is concerned). I'll drink Jack Daniels if they don't have makers so i guess i need to learn how to sew and knit, but how will that get me laid?

BTW ALienX they have Michelob in Area 51, Anheusher Busch is everywhere!

Aegmorgil · 30 Jun 2006, 01:11 AM

I'm an import, guinness and rum drinker almost exclusively. LT will be arresting me shortly....

BR7 · 30 Jun 2006, 07:16 AM

There is no substitute

Kabuchan · 30 Jun 2006, 07:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by floresdave

Makers Mark Johnie Walker or Henry Weinhards basically all i drink(as far as alcohol is concerned). I'll drink Jack Daniels if they don't have makers so i guess i need to learn how to sew and knit, but how will that get me laid?

BTW ALienX they have Michelob in Area 51, Anheusher Busch is everywhere!

It won't, we'd probably set you up with that cowboy in the corner singing show tunes! LMAO

MikeyBK · 30 Jun 2006, 08:25 AM

Pina Coladas and Margaritas for me!!

lfcrule1972 · 5 Jul 2006, 09:02 PM

Hey this is turning into a meeting of alcoholics anonymous......... I will go first....

Hi everyone - I am lfcrule1972 and I am an alcoholic.............

smkymntgrl · 5 Jul 2006, 09:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lfcrule1972

Hey this is turning into a meeting of alcoholics anonymous......... I will go first....

Hi everyone - I am lfcrule1972 and I am an alcoholic.............

The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem!!!

29 Jun 2006, 09:01 PM	#1
lfcrule1972 Liverpool 'til I die...... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: England Posts: 365	People and their Drinks PEOPLE & THEIR DRINKS A recent magazine survey, interviewed fifty bartenders and they were asked if they could identify a customer’s personality on what drinks they ordered? Although interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results: IF WOMEN DRINK ... BEER Personality: Casual, low maintenance; down to earth. Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool. COCKTAILS OR BLENDER DRINKS WITH UMBRELLA Personality: Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the ass. Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy. MIXED DRINKS - NO UMBRELLAS E.G.; GIN AND TONIC / SCOTCH AND SODA Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants Approach: If she wants you, she’ll send YOU a drink. WATER Personality: Pretentious and is looking for a serious relationship. Approach: Don’t. WINE - (BOTTLED, NOT 4 LITRE CASK) Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated. Approach: Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation. BACARDI BREEZER, RED SQUARE, ARCHERS COOLER, SMIRNOFF ICE, MUDSHAKE ETC. Personality: Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has no clue. Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is... and you’re in. CAPE VELVET Personality: Annoying voice, bit of a tart. Approach: Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub. SHOTS AND SLAMMERS (TEQUILA, VODKA, AFTERSHOCK ETC.) Personality: Hangs around with male work pals or looking to get drunk...and naked. Approach: Easiest hit in the pub, Nothing to do but wait....... IF MEN DRINK... (As always, very simple and clear cut.) CIDER He’s probably under-aged and wants to get laid. CHEAP DOMESTIC BEER He’s poor / student and wants to get laid. CASTLE LAGER BEER He likes good beer and wants to get laid. IMPORTED BEER He’s old; he likes good beer and wants to get laid. GUINNESS The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another. WATER He just threw up and is trying to wash the taste out of his mouth so that he can still get laid WINE He’s hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid. VODKA OR BRANDY Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid. PORT Thinks he’s sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to get laid. WHISKY He doesn’t give two $hits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid. JACK DANIELS Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid. RUM OR TEQUILA Likes fighting almost as much as getting laid. BACARDI BREEZER, RED SQUARE, ARCHERS COOLER, SMIRNOFF ICE, ETC He’s gay (blatantly) - don’t turn your back or pick up any dropped change. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit! __________________ "There will come a moment when you have the chance to do the right thing......" "I Love those moments - I like to wave at them as they pass by...." Stop !! Before you post read this ! cynthia is Queen of the smilies !

29 Jun 2006, 10:08 PM	#2
Kabuchan Digital Video Enthusiast Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: 6000 ft above Sea Level Posts: 399	That's priceless, lfcrule1972. Love it! Wine drinker myself, but I think Paris is a bit spoiled! Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

29 Jun 2006, 10:40 PM	#3
AlienX69 Interstellar Traveler Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Area 51 Posts: 550	TEQUILA, Please ...... Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

29 Jun 2006, 10:40 PM	#4
lfcrule1972 Liverpool 'til I die...... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: England Posts: 365	I have never been to Paris, either the French Capital nor the Hotel Heiress..... Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

29 Jun 2006, 10:41 PM	#5
lfcrule1972 Liverpool 'til I die...... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: England Posts: 365	Mines a whisky then Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

29 Jun 2006, 10:42 PM	#6
lfcrule1972 Liverpool 'til I die...... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: England Posts: 365	Doesn't look good for Guinness drinkers tho eh ? Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

29 Jun 2006, 11:19 PM	#9
floresdave results may vary Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 164	Makers Mark Johnie Walker or Henry Weinhards basically all i drink(as far as alcohol is concerned). I'll drink Jack Daniels if they don't have makers so i guess i need to learn how to sew and knit, but how will that get me laid? BTW ALienX they have Michelob in Area 51, Anheusher Busch is everywhere! Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit! Last edited by floresdave; 29 Jun 2006 at 11:21 PM

30 Jun 2006, 01:11 AM	#10
Aegmorgil Super Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tangent Universe Posts: 232	I'm an import, guinness and rum drinker almost exclusively. LT will be arresting me shortly.... Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

30 Jun 2006, 07:16 AM	#11
BR7 He is coming to your little town! Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Sioux City,IA Posts: 2,137	There is no substitute Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit! __________________ My Blu-ray Collection

30 Jun 2006, 08:25 AM	#13
MikeyBK Digital Video Maniac Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: USA Posts: 1,131	Pina Coladas and Margaritas for me!! Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit! __________________ MBK Antec 900 ATX Mid Tower Antec True Power Trio 650W PSU ABIT IP35 Pro LGA 775 Intel Motherboard Intel Core 2 Duo E6600 2.4GHz CPU (Overclocking @ 2.9GHz) XFX GeForce 8600GT 256MB GDDR3 Video Card Patriot eXtreme Performance (2 x 1GB) DDR2 SDRAM Seagate Barracuda(Perpendicular Recording) 320GB SATA 3.0Gb SAMSUNG 18X LightScribe SATA SH-S183L DVD±R Sony DRU-810A IDE DVD±R *BenQ LS DW1655 IDE DVD±R

5 Jul 2006, 09:02 PM	#14
lfcrule1972 Liverpool 'til I die...... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: England Posts: 365	Hey this is turning into a meeting of alcoholics anonymous......... I will go first.... Hi everyone - I am lfcrule1972 and I am an alcoholic............. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter Facebook Reddit!

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